put your faith in what you most believe in

With the ever-expanding inventory that the warehouse has, not to mention the suddenly expanding staff, having just two computers in the office was not going to cut it anymore. And so it was that Claudia did begin her begging, and pleading, and complaining, and other such tactics to try and convince her ever-so-cheap boss that at least one new computer was absolutely necessary otherwise the whole world may fall in upon itself and the only remaining survivor would likely be Artie's eyebrows because goodness knows those things have got to be indestructible. (Good at the overdramatic, but not so great at the "flattery gets you what you want" angle.)

After many days of the begging, and pleading, and complaining, and other such tactics, finally an agreement was made. According to Artie, a brand new computer wasn't in the budget, however if Claudia could find an old computer for relatively cheap to buy somewhere, she was allowed to attempt to "spruce it up" ("You mean upgrade? It's called upgrading, Artie.") so long as she could also do so for "cheap".

Finding an old computer for pretty cheap was easy enough, but Claudia ran into a bit of a snag when it came to the parts. Not in that she couldn't do the job, she'd "spruced up" and fixed plenty of old gadgets before... It was finding the things she needed to do the job. More specifically, one thing. A vacuum tube. (Seriously, a vacuum tube. Not using the term "old computer" loosely here, not one bit.)

Now, one would think, after all the "incidents" she's been through since her first days at the warehouse (not to mention all the horror stories Artie's told or partially-told), she'd know not to go messing around with artifact technology to "spruce up" her new (OLD) computer. Buuuut... "Desperate times call for desperate measures", and all that. Besides, what harm could a vacuum tube bring, really? Artifact or not... IT'S A VACUUM TUBE.

Eventually, and we'll not discuss how long it took after the initial begging and pleading, the job was done. The "computer" (and Claudia will only ever refer to it with quotation marks because despite her best work, the thing is still gonna run like it was built out of a vacuum tube and really slow dust bunnies) was finished. And after all that, looking at the disgrace of a machine, Claudia does not have the heart to even turn it on.

She stares at it, and sits. Stands. And sits. And stands. And, finally, from her spot, slumped over on a desk in the office of the warehouse, she calls for emotional support...

"ARTIE!!"